Sunday, April 24, 2005

yawns..so tired..wk till 10+ yesterday & only went to sleep at 1+ this morn..haha..cos i was watching Oliver Twist..it's a very long ago show cum musical that me n my sisters watch as a kid..been searching for it for like 10yrs..& mer air finally found the vcd!! so was happily watching it yesterday though i was super tired.. ;p was actually feeling quite sad yesterday..i also duno why..jus suddenly can't joke ard like i normally do..almost started crying during praise & worship yesterday...but decide not to..cos i hafta wk after that..haha..hmm..maybe cos i gave up a $7/hr job for my team leader...if i take that job..it's like an extra $160 a month..only mag knows wat's e job..hopefully she get that job & earn more..then maybe she'll be happier..it's hard wking 7 days a week la..but it's only for a month or 2...so mag..jiayou!

now at office..gonna wk from 9am to 9pm today..9 to 1 @ office & 130 to 9 @ bkshop..hopefully bkshop not gg to hv lots of ppl..hmm..today can't go meet sue ann they all bcos of wk..but nvm..haha..cos not many girls gg..& they're gg kbox i think..so doesn't matter..cos it's not like i'll wanna sing in front of the guys...most ppl in my class would think i'm a more "guy" person..cos i'm the only sports girl in class..& i'm definitely not super girly..but i'm not lor..haha..sometimes i feel so alone..in class..i'm jus a loner but with lots of ppl ard..

Xiang..remember in yr1 when ur fren wrote u a letter & u read a part of it aloud?e part abt hving lots of ppl ard a person, & who seem to hv such good frens with that person but actually the person is jus a loner? think that applies to me..

anyway..like xiang says..went to watch 2 matches @ SBC..really wanna play again! the feeling on court is so wonderful..hmm..xiang says if her team gg to become 5..she get me to be ball controller..well i'll definitely take it..but do i wanna be point guard again?haha..actually i still prefer my sec sch position-forward..but coach tattoo made me point guard..it's stressful u know..so many things to remember...haiz..duno la...honestly i think i'm jus an extra in my teams..in Cedar..i was useful cos i assist julie & run well with my best partner, zuibadah..but i dun score much...in vj..yr 1 cos i could replace ally..i know i'm not supposed to feel that way..cos violet said that to me..but hey..come on..if ally wasn't injured..i wouldn't be on the team in yr1..my skill was horrible compared to the rest..in yr 2 cos i know i'm e only yr 2 point guard..who can remember the plays for mic to score...seriously..WHO AM I? i'm jus like an extra in ppl's life..there to highlight ppl's lives but not my own...nothing to my own name...

maybe that's e reason i like the song i included in this post..i hv no idea who i am..but my Lord knows me personally..including me in His plan..thank you Lord..that You love me as i am..a nobody to others & even myself..but a somebody to You..

P.S. Anna introduced this song to me..it's by Casting Crowns..

Who Am I?

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You're

Chorus:
I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours

Who Am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love and watch me rise again
Who Am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

I am Yours
Whom shall I fear
Whom shall I fear
'Cause I am Yours
I am Yours

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beLoVeD jkMy out
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